1. Offering your friend’s carbon road bike at an online second-hand shop for 199 euros and watching him decline 100 calls per minute.
2. Pouring soda into his or her water bottle and waiting for a smaller version of the Yellowstone park geyser after the slightest shake.
3. Touching the air valve of your friend’s front wheel while hissing loudly to imitate the sound of leaking air. Your friend won’t be happy with you thinking you let the air out of their tube.
4. Lock your friend’s bike and leave just to observe their astonishment from afar after they find out they cannot ride away.
5. Calling them that a local newspaper is interested in writing a feature about their cycling career.
6. Hiding a tiny piece of delicate French cheese into the rear pocket of their jersey a few days before April 1 just to wait for the monumental smell caused by the fermentation process.
7. Gearing down the rear derailleur after they left the bike for a moment and enjoying their clumsy start when he or she gets back on the bike.
8. Telling your friends that e-bikes were officially allowed on this year’s Tour de France.
